My Thought at This Moment

It is so strange to me how I sometimes go a couple of days without putting anything on this blog.  Others, I post multiple things.  It is also very odd that I am just now realizing that I am this blog.  It is like me putting the most personal feelings I have out in the open for everyone to read.  I wonder, is every person who blogs as revealing as I am about their true feelings?  I don’t hold anything back.  When I write it comes straight from my heart.  I don’t plan to write about anything I post on here.  I never think about a topic and how I am going to write about it.  I don’t have a clue that I am even going to write it until the moment I do.  I don’t write about everything I feel.  It is just an instantaneous urge and words flow out of my mind in a way that I know I have to put on paper at that instant.  If it doesn’t happen as soon as I start feeling and thinking it, I lose that moment of emotion, and it is lost (what could have been written).  So, I am not the type of blogger that says to myself, “hey, I am going to write about this later”.  I am writing in the exact moment of the feeling and I never know when I am going to write something.  I actually have to start texting myself what I am writing sometimes, because I am not close to paper.  So, I guess what prompted me to write this is that I am feeling, at this moment, like I am getting really deep into feelings that I don’t want to be in and I have been freely posting them on my blog.  I never did this for any kind of attention or even to try to be a recognized writer.  I love to write, but my writing has always been the same.  I only write what I feel, when I feel it or what I am thinking at the moment I am thinking it.  Unless, of course it was a college research paper, which it seems I have written hundreds of (that is the type of writing I hate).  I have to dig to find information.  But, what I enjoy is writing where I don’t have to dig for the information because, I am the information.  It is me.  All of it is me.  Every word on my blog is me.  It is my core and my soul and my heart and I never dreamed so many people would connect with me.  I did this without realizing how personal it was going to be and how every single person that reads what I write knows me better, probably than people that I have known for years. Okay, I don’t know why I even wrote this, but it is what I am thinking at the moment and for some reason I just wanted to place this particular thought into words.  So, I guess that, because all of you wonderful human beings that I have been blessed to encounter, by just being me openly.  I guess I just wanted to share this moment of thought with you.  Haha.  I am smiling.  You guys are so special.  I love you all so much in a way that, only each of you reading this can relate to.  This IS A VERY SPECIAL COMMUNITY.  I love every single one of you in such a strange way.  A new kind of love, don’t think it has been defined before.  Guess I’ll just call it My blog is me. My followers know me in a special kind of way.  My blog = me and My blog (me) + My followers (those who interact with me and my blog writing)  = the definition of love that I feel that is a different kind of love


5 comments on “My Thought at This Moment

  1. Your post made me smile. I can totally relate to the texting thing. My best work is at 70 mph. I keep a notebook and frantically jot it down as soon as I get to a stoplight. Driving frees the mind. I just wish my mind were freer off the road! Frantic Life tends to stifle creativity if not given time to let it Sink In.

    • Yes, it seems that driving is our thinking time. I always seem to think the most when I am driving or riding in the car with someone. Just looking at the world around you and thinking. Expression is a very beautiful thing. I love this place. Much love to you.

  2. I know what you mean. I always thought that nobody would care about my thoughts and feelings…so I did not share them. Because of this, along with so many others feeling the same way, I felt isolated. It was only when I braved putting myself out there that I learned I live in a wonderful world full of wonderful people. We may not always share the same opions on topics…but we always feel the need to know somebody else is listening to us and what we say matters…because it does. What you put out in your blog matters because, like you said, IT IS YOU. God Bless. 🙂

  3. I think a lot of us blog the same way. I think of it having a coffee or a long chat on the phone with a friend. It doesn’t always happen every day but you know in the back of your mind that if you need to talk the blog is always there to “listen”.

  4. I can only think of the “Rules” that Natalie Goldberg wrote of in her amazing and timeless book on writing, “Writing Down The Bones: Freeing The Writer Within,” (Copyright 1986, 2005, by Natalie Goldberg). It is a book that I encourage everyone who writes to read over-and-over again. It’s that powerful and inspiring.
    The “rules” are:
    1. Keep your hand moving
    2. Don’t cross out
    3. Don’t worry about spelling, punctuation, grammar
    4. Lose Control
    5. Don’t think, don’t get logical.
    6. Go for the jugular

    Editing can come later – it’s all about honesty, and your writing is honest. Keep it rolling – it is your touchstone to sanity in a most difficult time. Namaste . . .

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