Update and Message

Unfortunately, my husband passed away In March of 2014. This blog is dedicated to him and tells how wonderful of a man he was.

This is on my blog.  It says better than any other words what he meant to me and who he was as a person.

FOR MY HUSBAND

– I see you as a blessing – You are my guide – My manual to life

 –   My definitions of all meanings lie within you

  – You Define:

– Value – Honesty – Strength – Dedication – Trust – Integrity

– and all things Good

– Your soul is like a glossery defining the right way to be

 – I pray that I have given to you in return:      

                      – A guide to love – Faith – Forgiveness

– And Grace

~ L.G.

 He taught me some of the most valuable life lessons that have made me who I am. Today, I am still grieving. It is an up and down battle. He was in so much pain. I never knew that it was possible for a person to endure such pain. The most amazing thing to me was his Faith. I saw him day after day hunched over on the floor crying in pain praying to God and asking Jesus to please take the pain away. Even though the pain continued, he refused to give up faith. My husband demonstrated the most amazing example of unwaivering Faith I have ever witnessed. I bathed him, I watched him cry, I slept in the hospital bed with him, chased nurses around while he laid on the hospital floor screaming in pain for his meds. This blog tells how wonderful of a man he was. He instilled a set of values in me that I don’t see in many people today. He talked to me about life and how people should be. He showed me that a relationship can be great. He taught me communication between a man and a woman without fighting.

I need to say one thing to everyone who gets any notification when I post on this blog. I heard that people lose faith when they lose a loved one. I have heard people feel like giving up because they have lost their faith. This is what you need to know.

WE ARE HUMAN AND GOD KNOWS THAT WE ARE HUMAN. WHEN WE LOSE A LOVED ONE IT IS NATURAL TO BECOME DULL AND NUMB. WE MIGHT FEEL WE HAVE LOST FAITH BUT WE HAVE NOT. IT IS A NATURAL HUMAN EMOTION. WHAT I DID WHEN I DIDN’T FEEL LIKE TALKING TO GOD, PRAYING, OPENING A BIBLE, ETC. IS THIS:

I TOLD GOD, “I LOVE YOU AND I KNOW THIS IS A HUMAN EMOTION AND YOU KNOW WE ARE HUMAN. I AM NOT LOSING FAITH, BUT BECOMING NUMB AND DISCONNECTED. I TRUST YOU AND AM ASKING YOU TO HOLD ON TO ME GOD. I AM LETTING GO RIGHT NOW AND YOU KNOW IT’S HUMAN EMOTION AND PART OF GRIEVING. GOD PLEASE DO NOT LET GO OF ME AND HOLD ON TO ME. I KNEW HE HEARD ME AND I TRUSTED HE WAS DOING JUST AS I ASKED. THIS IS MY MESSAGE TO ALL THOSE GRIEVING AND FEELING GUILT LIKE YOU HAVE LOST FAITH. IF YOU REALLY LOST FAITH, YOU WOULD NOT FEEL GUILTY ABOUT IT. YOU AREN’T LOSING FAITH. YOU ARE NUMB AND EXPERIENCING HUMAN EMOTION AND PART OF A GRIEVING PROCESS. GOD KNOWS THAT. ASK HIM NOT TO LET GO OF YOU AND WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE. YOU WILL HAVE A KIND OF FAITH YOU NEVER KNEW POSSIBLE AND AN EVEN CLOSER RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.

LOVE TO ALL AND MAY GOD BLESS ALL!

 

Life of Me

Okay,

I have been so silent and not in a poetic writing state.  However, I have been seeking the words of God.  I am trying to help my husband understand the meaning of the words, walk blindly with faith.  So, from here on, for a while atleast, my wordpress blog is going to have a lot of meaning behind faith, grace, forgiveness, repentance, and my big inspiration at the time blind faith.  Hope you will join me in this part of my life expressions.  I post what I feel.  I write what I feel.  This blog, as I said before, is ME.  It is my heart, my feelings, my trials, my struggles, my mind, my journey, as a human being and a child of God.  Much love to all.  God bless everyone and I hope to start a meaningful inspirational prayer chain for every person who is part of my blog regardless of the struggles they are going through.  Let us find our way through faith, Jesus Christ, and truth of the word of God together.

Quote

“It is so much easier to hurt others than to endure the pain you own. The pain that belongs to you.  The pain you are afraid to feel.  It is so much easier to take the easy way out and for some reason, I never do, but I didn’t think I was supposed to…”

-Laura G.

The Easy Way…

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Unbreakable

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“When you try to break something so pure and beautiful it ultimately ends up remaining beautiful even after it has been broken” words of Laura G

Art Source: Pinterest

Repinned from:

http://pinterest.com/pinkzlee/

Visit ts2.mm.bing.net

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Unspeakable

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Several Thoughts on This

1. Sometimes what I feel is so deep I can’t express it with words

2. Unable to speak of what you see, because others are blind to the truth

3. Having to endure the impacts and blows of an unkind world, unable to say anything because it won’t make a difference anyway.

4.  Enduring painful words and speaking none back because you know speaking back only makes for more conflict.

5. Suffering in silence

6.  Strength, because one can endure pains that others would not even begin to comprehend if you verbally expressed them.

7.  Rendered speechless, because what you see is just too cruel and selfish that it is beyond your realm of thinking.

Thoughts of Laura G. on art.

Art Source: Pinterest

Repinned from

SaatchiOnline .com

Saatchi Online Artist: Marek Hospodarsky; Oil, 2011, Painting Mustapha

http://www.saatchionline.com/art/Painting-Oil-Mustapha/55846/1283459/view

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THIS STORM…HERE.

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This piece of Art makes me feel something strong.  I wrote a poem based on this picture and how it symbolizes my personal life state and feelings.  ENJOY…

THIS STORM…HERE

-This Storm

-Here

-Now

-Our Storm

-Us, We, You and I

-One United

-Fighting Together

-Not Giving up

-Not looking back

-Swimming through Rough waters

-Navigating these sea’s

-Tire, we do

-But, stop, No we’ll never…

-We are fighters that fight

-In ways only we know

-It is our fight together

-Navigating these Deep Hellish Waters

-That we’ve unjustly been thrown into

-A storm like no other

-It has us to depths of the Ocean

-Deeper than most dare to go

-A storm that sinks most ships

-And drowns each life on it

-But, oh, I said NOOOO

-WE ARE SWIMMING, NOT DROWNING!!!!!!!!!!

-NOW, I SAY IT AGAIN

-Us, We, You and I

-One United

-WE ARE SWIMMING, NOT DROWNING!!!!!

-Fighting Together

-Not Giving up

-Not looking back

-SWIMMING UNTIL WE SEE THE DAYLIGHT AGAIN

-TOGETHER WE WILL GET BACK TO THE TOP

-SWIM OUT OF THE OCEAN

-WASH UP ONTHE SHORE

-AND WALK HAND IN HAND

-SO HAPPY WE NEVER GAVE UP

-RELIEVED, THAT THE STORM IS OVER

By: Laura  G

Art Source: Pinterest

http://www.liveinternet.ru/users/875697/post138516139/page9.html

*Mermaids Kiss*

from pins from liveinternet.ru

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See Me

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“He can see me for who I am, He can see the beauty within, He can see the beauty of difference, Why can’t you….see me?” – words by Laura G

Art source:

Art Source: pinterest

Saatchi online artist: Tigran Tsitoghdzyn; oil paininting, 2012, “Mirror”

http://saatchionline.com

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Stop…Please

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“Stop Hurting Him, Please!!!” – Words by: L.G.

Art Source: pinterest

Saatchi online artist: Lou Ros; Acrylic, 2012, Painting

http://saatchionline.com

to my in laws and response from a reader

I posted this back in May I think. My husband asked me
to take it down
This is a response from a reader. I like to post the ones that means a lot to me, as you have probably noticed…

First I want to say that I love my in-laws.  I thought, and I hope it isn’t just a thought, but the truth.  I believed we had a good relationship before all of this happened.  I wish to just forget about all the in between bad stuff that has happened between us and go back to the good and start fresh from that point.  If they do happen to read this post, I want them to know that I love them and in my heart, I truly do care and I really WANT a good relationship with them.  I want it very much.  That is why I refuse to hold anger or resentment.  We have had our words over this in the past.  I admit there was one situation where I did get angry and said some things to them and I publically apologize for that.  Please, can we start anew.  If you are reading.  I love you and I cared about our relationship.  The fact that it was broken has hurt me and I want back what we had.  Lets agree to disagree, let go of the past.  Remember the good, go back to that and forget the in-between.  I can do it.  I want to do it.

Now, below is a response from one of my followers on one of my posts that I would like to share.  Love her. http://intothelightofthenightkitchen.wordpress.com/.  Octavia02

Hi Laura, I hope you’re doing well today. I was thinking about your blog and in-laws.. I think your husband is so proud of you and how you’ve channeled your hurt, fear, love and confusion into this blog that helps other people. My guess is he wanted to show his parents thinking they could not help but see how special both you and the blog are. One thing I’ve learned is never underestimate the level of irrational anger cancer can inspire.
My mother is out of her mind angry with me constantly. It’s hard on my father as well as me. I have to believe that their treatment of you is much more about their son’s illness than about anything to do with the mother of their grandchildren.
That doesn’t make their behavior hurt any less but hopefully it will help ease your questions of self-doubt should they ever arise. Lots of love to you.
-k.

I Stand For Us My Love

-I wear my hat, oh everywhere

-I care not what they think

-I care for you

-I care for me

-I care for us, you see

-So proud I am

-To wear my hat

-Odd glances, I do get

-But my oh my

-They make me smile

-Cause they don’t see

-The glances that they give to me

-They make me proud

-That I love you so very much

-Instead of caring what they think

-I’m proud to know this one true thing

-As little as it means to me

-The glances I receive

-It just reminds me one more time

-How true my love is for you

-I am proud of who I am

-I stand for you, I stand for me

-I stand for courage, I stand for honor

-I stand for strength in what we are enduring

-It’s you and I

-It is our love

-I stand for us, united here as one.